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PROFILE Being Me is the greatest challenge to keep on moving when everything messed up to keep on going when my vision turns upside down to keep calm when my anger explodes to keep smiling when all I have is sadness to enjoy the real happiness that came only for a while but only this way these lessons had taught Me how to live these challenges that made me stronger inside out these stories that gave me strength to my weaknesses is nothing better but THE BEST! “When you leave, remember to look back to see those you’re leaving behind. You never know, but they might be feeling miserable." YOUR SAY SO YESTERDAY October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 I'LL BE WATCHING YOU AimanKU AszafiraKU AtiqaKU AmiraKU AsiahKU FadilaKU FyraKU FarahinKU FazilaKU HadiKU MusuhKU HairulKU HikmaKU JuwairiyahKU MarizzaKU Kak ainKU Kak hannahKU Lembah IlmuKU NabilaKU NurulhudaKU NisyaKU SriKU UttKU ZulianaKU CREDITS edits by: nurfa
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Saturday, January 31, 2009 @ 10:48 PM
cool  zaf : satu buku tao kena belajar, baik belajar!djah : ha! mati aku mati aku! mel : ape nk bwat. dh kate pelajar, belajar je lh. sumpah gmbr ni cool. Friday, January 30, 2009 @ 8:53 PM
I don't care because I want to force myself to be tough. Is love all about possessing? Is care all about protecting? I hate myself when I feel nothing. I hate myself for not being concern. I hate myself for not pleasing others. But don’t you know that I tried? Trying very best to go against my mind. Cause my mind says, I can’t tolerate immature thoughts. I am not saying I am sensible, but atleast I think I am what I am supposed to be, a coming 20 year old girl. So tell me, is it my fault now, for my ignorance? and now, I can sincerely thank you for making me stronger than I thought I could be. Thursday, January 29, 2009 @ 9:32 PM
nurfarahin's bday  walaupun awk tinggi kte pendek, awak besar kte kecik, awk suka nahu kte tk, awk tak boleh balik malam kte boleh, awk nk sambung mesir kte msia, awk pandai IT kte tk, awk suke chickenchop makcik kanteen kte tk, awak tetap kawan kita. awak tetap ratuhati kita. selamat hari jadi sayang. @ 3:03 PM
dont define me. when i mean i share different stuffs with different people, i really mean it; which explains why im never the same person you thought i was, or would be. Wednesday, January 28, 2009 @ 12:14 AM
with you, mdnafis. With you, I feel like I can be silly and stupid. I can be full of nonsense, like a bottomless pit of senseless stuffs. I can be unglam, and dumb. And yet know that despite all that, I’m not being judged. With you, I speak my mind and not hold back. I can show when I’m upset and frustrated, I can show when I’m irritated. And you’ll still listen even if my frustrations are over silly small insignificant things. You tease me endlessly, but somehow I’ve never once gotten angry with you. No matter how much you laugh at the things I say or do, I’ll just feel like laughing along. Monday, January 26, 2009 @ 12:51 AM
post mencarut. mereka kata persahabatan itu indah aku pula kata persahabatan memang indah, malah lebih indah dari bunga lebih manis dari madu kerna keindahan persahabatan ini aku sanggup memendam sakit hati dan cemburu yang bertandang dihati kecilku aku sanggup membiarkan KAU dan KAU dan KAU ( ada 3 org ) pergi melancong dan berhorey-horey di batam manakala aku disini harus BEKERJA lebih memilukan aku sanggup menggantikan dan menghabiskan segala tugas2mu yg terbengkalai! tahukah kau aku terpaksa bangun pagi seawal 530 petang untuk pergi kerja? demi kau, aku sanggup berlari-lari anak dengan beberapa ekor kucing comot dibawah kolong block aku! demi kau, aku dah kehilangan suara lunak bercream aku. demi kau, kelopak mata aku hampir tercabut kerana asyik membeliakkan mataku dihadapan murid2. murid2 kau sangat nakal. untung kau jadikan aku penggantimu. kerana aku telah beri meraka satu layangan kuat dipipi mereka. (bedek je) aku tidak minta jasaku dikenang, tapi cukuplah dibalas. (lg worst!) dhlh.bbual dengan kau nurathifah, ramiza dan nurfathin pun bkn korg baca. bencilh! bye. Sunday, January 25, 2009 @ 12:10 AM
i've made it soo obvious. I understand that you regard what I've done to you as wrong. But i just cant seem to see that they are all my mistakes. How can I be true to you my innermost feelings when I myself can't still figure out. Haven't I told you that this is not the right moment yet for me to tell you about my feelings? Haven't I told that you should wait for a person whom you love until it is the right time because we still have a long way to go? Can't you just let fate decide what's going to happen between us and not blame the people from my past, as they do not have anything to do with what is going on now?! are you afraid of your own shadows hovering over you? As you know, I am still a daughter to my mother, an elder sister to my younger sisters, a friend to my friends, and of course a student committed to her studies and most importantly I am God's slave bounded by loads of responsibilities. You keep blaming me for deceiving you about a lot of things when I think it is unnecessary to tell you every single detail of my life. How can you expect me to have conversations with you face to face when we meet without intending to? Didn't it occur to you that I might not have anything to say to you at such a moment? I thought by not texting you for quite a while would help you to get over me. Instead you assume I did not contact because I despise you. by the way, if you think you are not a good friend to me then it just shows that you will NOT be a good stranger too. anyway just to emphasise, you ARE still my friend. Friday, January 23, 2009 @ 11:12 PM
bukan hubungan yang kumahu tapi kejujuran Dan demikianlah semuanya harus terjadi Kerna memang harus terjadi Hidup ini terus berlanjut Kita semua pun pernah merasakan dikhianati dan mengkhianati Setia dan tidak setia Kita semua pernah merasakan cinta Yang membawa kita ke tempat tertinggi Kita lalu merasakan yang namanya terjatuh Kerna kesalahan kita sendiri Kita tidak mati Tetapi lukanya membuat kita tidak dapat berjalan seperti dulu lagi. Monday, January 19, 2009 @ 11:26 PM
Everything is left hanging, let it be. It is hard for a woman to be with a man who keeps saying that he is not good enough. the woman is hurt. but the man does not realise it. and once again i heard those word. those hurting words. those words sliced my heart, clean but deep. but then you left me at my lowest. but i'll be okay because i have learnt to take all the blames. i have learnt to keep my cool. and i would rather keep mum then get involved in a heated argument. cause deep down, my heart aches. dont worry, i'll be okay cause i know you've shown your true colour. @ 9:08 PM
gambar - preu 1 07  suke eh suke! zulianaku syg. ok gler rindu nan sushi bedok. fathin, bayi perempuanku. wah aku. bakar sate tk psl2. kecilnye akuu. cm ibujari. main sey makaroni seya sey samurai samurai. class preu 1. Arnold. rowmates preu1. ratuhatiku. rindu uniform. =((kan ku jadikan kau kenangan yang terindah. Sunday, January 18, 2009 @ 9:24 PM
Are you still the same? If you need to go, please just leave. don't hang around; don't pull my heart strings. Ever felt like someone you knew turned into stranger; like you don't know who they are anymore, and there's nothing much to talk about. Saturday, January 17, 2009 @ 12:49 AM
Hati menjerit kerinduan  sedang berfikir. sedang berbincang. gler focus sae kiteorang.yela dateline hantar kerjasekolah tu tgl 1 jam je katekn.  hahah. dh start dh aku ajak berbual. farahin layan. golongan yang mencari ketengan untuk habiskan kerja sekolah. ni part tk kelakar.tgl 13 mins je untuk hantar.terpaksa tiru paper jamila. =p  ok best! dpt asnwer. laju je tangan.ehh.mana atiqa dan athifa eh? rindu lagi. bila eh kita semua boleh ddk satu meja sama2 buat kerja sekolah? @ 12:10 AM
si pengukir senyuman nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: Kau watpe %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: msg kawan aku nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: haha %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: ape hahaha? nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: slaen mcg watpe nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: yela. tkley haha cakap!! %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: selain msg kawan aku,aku genyeh mata. nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: mepek sae jwpan! nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: Tanye aku lak nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: cpt2!! %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: KAU SEDANG BWATPE nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: aku nga reply soalan kau nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: mwawawa %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: eyy.mepek sae kau! nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: Kte same2 mepek la nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: kau tknk same nan aku ke %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: tknk.aku tknk sama mcm kau! atleast aku tk semepek kau ok nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: yelaaa.aku sorg je mepek k %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: ok bgs nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: *nangis* %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: *hulurkn tissue* nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: *koyakkan tissue * %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: *kasi saputangan* nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: * gunting saputangan * %sitikhadijah% Dont define me. says: HOI APE NI SUME AKU KAC KAU BWAT CMNI! *PIJAK PERUT* nazo_namlun@hotmail.com says: * gigit pusat * Thursday, January 15, 2009 @ 1:11 AM
who would have thought now that we are strangers? I thought I could handle it well. I thought I could understand you. I thought you were smart enough to notice. To think I was wrong. It just deteriorated, didnt it? I tried to understand your position. as a friend. but i wished you could understand mine as a friend too. How much I miss you, only God knows. Tell me I'm over-sensitive. Please. I wished I was really over-sensitive. And that all these never happened. And yes, i wished you would tell me we are fine as we were. @ 12:45 AM
maybe its just the hormones that makes me feel this way. it feels restless. it's like everything you do or say seems wrong. it's like your every answer to my questions aint satisfying at all. and every joke you make does not even sound funny anymore. it's like im jealous of everyone and everything. it's like i want to meet people but i dont want to. i feel im not even listening properly, or maybe i cant. i know i heard you,but i didnt know what i was hearing. and i really dont understand. my mind is not where my physical being is. I tend to feel that i miss people, but i cant pinpoint and say who, cos i have no idea who. it's like i want to tell, but i shouldnt tell, but i think i should tell, and i think i want to tell, cause it is gonna make me feel better Monday, January 12, 2009 @ 1:11 AM
اللهم انصر إخواننا في فلسطين Mentari menangis di senja memerah Bumi anbia menjadi padang jarak Puing-puing runtuhan berserakan Hanyir darah menyesak dada Tubuh layu gugur bergelimpangan Bertindih dalam kubur tanpa bernisan Di hujung sana berjuta kelaparan Di dera wabak yang menyiksakan Anak kecil bertanyakan bimbang Mengapa lena ibu terlalu panjang? di wajahnya mencerminkan kedukaan Bilakah pula ayah akan pulang? Dia yang tak mengerti apa Menjadi mangsa Suara tangis syair sendu Menghiris kalbu Bilakan berhenti kekejaman? Bilakan terhapus penindasan? Kemana hilangnya kemanusiaan? Entah bila akan pulih keharmonian? Sampai bila bersilih penderitaan? Bila pula akan muncul ketenangan? Bilakan damai akan menjelang? Soalan yang masih tiada jawapan @ 12:10 AM
dengan perpisahan ini, lebih terasa nikmat kerinduan. "kalau anti rindu ana, anti pandanglah langit. kan kita dua pandang langit yang sama, kalau masih rindu juga, anti doalah. kan kita dua berdoa pada tuhan yang sama. " mar, ana rindu. terlalu rindu. Friday, January 9, 2009 @ 11:00 PM
I miss you making me feel better Sometimes, I wish you would understand more Not you, it's you. Someday I'll be away, and perhaps it's too late to understand then. Sometimes, whatever I do, might not be right, might not take sense, might not be to your liking but bottomline is I still care for you. Will always care for you and love you. do you know how hard it is to turn you away and say evrything's fine?? especially when you asked. Do you know how hard it is to turn away ur concern, and put on a fake smile? And then, you turn your back on me and say i complain and expect too much from you. People need hope, but they trust fear. But you can still hope, can't you? Even when you know you're wasting your time, what harm can it do to hope? Wednesday, January 7, 2009 @ 12:45 AM
life is never one person. one person is never everything. We live in two different worlds. I wish i could change you. your thoughts. but what's the point? all i can do is just, be happy for you? yeah, i guess i can handle that. no matter how hard. even if it's all against what i think. my opinions. aren't you scared for the future? i think i am. really. but what good does it make when u can't live the present? i guess i'm such a hypocrite. i guess, the older you get, the more challenges you have to face. the more people you meet, the more things you observe. the more things you know. the more stuff you learn. life's THAT complicated, i suppose. Ya Allah, help her through this. please. and I pray to You, let their lives be worth living. i'm your friend. your listening ear? will always be one. (: after all that has happened, i just want you to be happy. and may you be the best that you can ever be. really. i'm honoured. thankyou.(: Sunday, January 4, 2009 @ 12:15 AM
-___-  untuk nur athifah *letak tangan atas bahu*. kalau kau buat buku, ketahuilah aku akan jadi orang yang pertama untuk membelinya,membacanya dan mencetaknya. hek! @ 12:01 AM
you've grown too much, nur amirah. seeing how happy you are leading your new life enjoying new people coming in your life makes me feel like im losing you more and more we’ve grown up friend grown up too much you and i are no longer in this together we are leading our own lives but you’re happy and that all matters but its a fact too that im losing you more and more im scared,what if one day we become strangers? Friday, January 2, 2009 @ 2:31 PM
and i'd never stop thinking. I was just thinking how great a word Fear can be. like how every night, i fear i wont wake up the next day, or worse, i wake up to never seeing one of my loveds ever again. like how every time, i raise my voice towards my elders, i fear not having the chance to apologise to them. like how every time, my parents complain of any pain on their body, my thoughts run wild, and i fear theres something else besides the pain. like how every time, i think about love, i fear falling in love, cos i fear falling out of love. like how every time, i fear Allah and his punishments, each time i hear something to do with religionn. and like every time i feel very happy, deep inside, i feel this fear, something is gonna be taken away from my life, and something sad is gonna happen, because i dont deserve this much happiness. and ive been thinking. thinking. thinking. of all other stuffs that has to do with this superficial world we live in. Thursday, January 1, 2009 @ 5:15 PM
kerja tuhan siapa tahu? selamat tahun baru! selamat tinggal 2008. tahun yang sangat bermakna buat diriku dan diri teman2 yang lain. tahun penentu untuk masa depan. sama ada berjaya dalam dua peperiksaan besar atau sebaliknya. Sejujurnya buat diri saya, dalam banyak2 tahun, ingin sekali saya mengulangi tahun 2007. Tahun 2007 tahun yang paling bahagia buat saya. tahun yang penuh dengan gelak tawa. tahun dimana saya ada Mardhiah md haron disisi saya. di saat saya rasa dunia ini tiada lagi insan yang mampu menjadi seperti Abu Bakar As-Siddiq-sahabat sejati Nabi, mardhiah membuktikan pada saya pandangan saya salah. saya ada mdnafis yang dekat dihati saya dan dekat dimata. saat sedih bertandang, dia lah yang mengukirkan senyuman. saya ada nurhakeemah yang tak pernah lali dengar keluhan saya. saya ada rafidah dan kak rusydah. bahagiakan hidup saya? pada tahun 2007 saya jumpa mereka. nurathifah, nurfathimah, nurfarahin, nuratiqah, nurfathin. mereka ratuhati saya. mereka anugerah tuhan. indahkan persahabatan? pada tahun itu juga, tahun pertama saya pergi camp - rebutia. pada rebutia saya kenal redha dan tawakal. camp yang meninggalkan kesan mendalam dalam diri. camp yang mendekatkan diri saya dengan siti ramiza. ramiza, kau bertakhta dihati aku. selama-lamanya. camp itu juga mengenalkan saya pada seorang gadis yang sangat saya sayang, aisyah. syah, meski syah dah lama membisu ketahuilah sayang djah pada syah takkan berkurangan. pada tahun 2007, saya belajar hidup berdikari disekolah tanpa nurkamaliah, aszafirah dan mardhiah. mereka di maarif horey2 saya di waktanjong kesunyian untuk awal bulan sahaja. pada tahun itu juga saya menyertai bahas 4pm. kenangan bersama nurfathin, marizzah dan mdrifdi takkan pernah luput dari ingatan. perasaan pada waktu menyampaikan hujjah dan juga membidas masih terasa. sakit perut sebelum menaiki pentas, mengiggil lutut kalah orang parkinson, kata-kata semangat dari kawan2 semuanya dirindui. Tahun itu juga, saya sedar cinta tidak semestinya memiliki. saya sedar saya sudah terlalu jauh tenggelam dalam cintanya dan saya harus selamatkan diri saya dari hanyut. lalu saya jumpa mereka. saya alihkan cinta saya padanya kepada mereka, iaitu teman-teman. bila tuhan tarik seseorang yang kita sayang maknanya Dia nak berikan kita yang lagi baikkan? janji tuhan benar. kerja tuhan siapa tahu? Andai saya dapat putarkan masa, ingin saya kembali pada tahun 2007. saya juga ingin tahun 2009 sama seperti tahun 2007. saya ingin mereka kembali, mardhiah, mdnafis, nurhakeemah, rafidah dan kak rusydah, tahu tak kalian perpisahan ini sangat menyakitkan? dan bila 2009 tiba, saya tahu saya harus berpisah dengan athifah, nurfarahin dan nuratiqah. inilah yang dikatakan hakikat perjuangan, penuh dengan onak duri. perpisahan takkan pernah putus-putus. "awak, kte takut. takut tak kuat. selama ini awak ada meneguhkan kita saat ingin rebah" "awak salah kalau begitu. sumber kekuatan awak berada di atas, bukan datang dari kte" bagai ada satu sentakkan, ya, sumber kekuatan saya berada di atas. |